I am endeavoring to dedicate 5 minutes a morning towards self improvement by reading on the topic of such. I’ve been reassured that 5 minutes will have an impact. After reading- I can go freely into the big, blue world of morningly traversing alleyways of toppling sunflowers, ankle scratching-in-passing brambles, & encountering fellow strangers with increasingly familiar faces who too keep the company of dogs; or the rainy, hood covered, waking world, of busied windshield wipers on the way to yoga class where things slow & the self improvement carries on in blossomed trajectory, or the world of early morning walks with dear ones where we tell each other of all the changes around us & within ourselves, giving voice to growth, disappointment, new art projects, perpetual disbelief capitulated with finger wags to the latest sagas from the conservative right, upcoming doctor visits, or what we plan on baking with garden surplus; & these are just some of the possible beginnings, rife with opportunity to notice of our internal processing take on new shapes.
The objective is repatterining.
If I encounter a feeling of discomfort or an old bee in my bonnet – it’s less on ruminating on such buzz or following it’s path of stress, but wondering how the bee got there in the first place, why does the bee make me uncomfortable, & what having the bee might have to tell me- as often we are inviting these bees in.
Bee in my bonnet. A bone to pick. Fit to be tied. Panties in a bunch. The mind is a florid, active place.
To think that such a minuscule amount of time sacrificed can create a significant shift plunges my heart into a pool of sadness- imagining how things could nearly effortlessly be better for myself & the people at large- if only we were all willing to dedicate a speck, which makes me need to prompt- well then, why do I feel sad about that? What do I have to learn from this sadness? What is the sadness telling me? How open am I to believing something else? And I can see those 5 minutes putting in the work.
Pigeon Heart Ponderings 